GERMINATION
1.7.17

new beginnings ending in heart break
or vise versa i think

i remember a time i was completely alone
lovers came and went
raindrops on windshields whipped off to see better
ahead
it has it’s perks
its own destinations – its own autonomous righteousness
the savant if its own being

now long love – sweet and comforting
familiar in the warmth of  not cold
learned of acceptance, tolerance and joy

but the in-between these two
is so rare and precious
to be alone yet in love
is a passion so strong
a fire the burns in love always even when it isn’t

and how foolish
to think we could have it all.
one, wants three.
two, wants three.
three, wants one and two.

i’ve trusted too much.
valued honesty in long term love.
here i am
this time it’s me
broken hearted.

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QUEERBOY
1.4.17
rare as long as it is
for names to find their place back in this story
a faint heartbeat of crime
finding you
soaking and whimper
for warmth
how can i resists such honest intentions?
how can the predator in me
resists the weakness in the prey
how come there’s a predator in me
and how dare i call you prey.
if i could you mirror
i would see friend – your name would never leave this pages
your grace and witt would be great company to my own

nothing is settled from forgiveness.

BOOT(s)TRAPS – a consolation
12.31.17
now more than ever
i feel the parchment paper tounge
of established comfort-ability.
i’ve made of myself the impossible
the golden minus reaching heights
discovering mountains
conquering lands
turning off calendars with whispers of success
leaping

shaking the year off the leg
not like a bad memory
a stubborn child
a painful sore
more  a dull ache
feeling heavy in the bones
calling for something it doesn’t even know
where it began
or how even
it will end

from bare feet
soles to the dessert spines
i cracked its back into regimen
disciplinary callousness
now laced up
boot-straps true to form
polished click clacking echoing on cement halls
they hear me coming
but i can no longer feel the ground

 

BABYLON
12.30.17
you will be the last lady of the year
how does it feel to be tarnished
unpolished used metals
grinding against the surface
how long did you have to hold your cheecks
high
before pretend softness felt
smoother?
you fool no one
i wonder if you fool yourself.
if this world is smoke and mirrors
we are perfectly in sync
rushing to caress the the other’s plumes
watching rabbits soak up the trustuing.

11.18.17
BABYLON
i’ve seen you die in bed-sheets
strangled by the beast of apathy
yours is soft as your pi
lgramage to turn a blind eye
and look self reflection deep in the face of
not too deep.
perhaps rationality will suffice
too soothe and lull it back
away

still – there’s depth to the curves of your
intentions are clouded by pressures
i will have whats left over, and make it
yours too.

10.12.17
FORTUNA
dawns in strange places
moringa leaves
and brazilian nuts
everything’s from africa.
good morning kisses and midnight cuddles make me curl away
when did arms become cages?
i miss everything i shouldn’t
we’re just a symptom of something sadder.

9/20/17
FORTUNA
you’re still a child
wanting to pet the wolf
“because you can”
tell me,
does the coat feel different from your carpet, rug, next-door mutt?
i bet you would
want to iron nature’s rug once it’s been tamed
the damage has already been done.