5.26.17
SUGARDADDY
regarding attention
too detailed to really be sown into some prism
you’ve decided to call it evil
by the beard on it’s snout
i’ve told you “yes” but only in the lightness of interpretation
fate, definition and discipline call it the law
i’m in-prisoned by a push for balance
shackled by guilt

ive sent a man to trial
for sequestering an idea of me
walled in by his thoughts
words that follow you home
crawl into your belly at night
dig out past nightmares
and leave you sighing with defeat
perhaps
if i could show you my shame-wounds
you would think twice
before you spit heavy desires
on my shirt.
this is not just about you.

5.17.17
SUGARDADDY
your words are poison
there are things in these gardens that can kill you
sun rays are invisible
but tell me you don’t see green withering
dirt cracking
under your stare
don’t look at me that way

their is instinct amongst ourselves
to not be eating
not be preyed upon
by our own kind
but this is corporate – be or be eaten
and i will not be subservient to your hunger
when your belly’s full and my person
unwilling.
i’m sorry
but im not.

5.16.17
BOOT(S)TRAPS
there was a glimpse of poetry
you have not tasted before
lovers calling your mouth
ashtray
flicking them off with your teeth

.

this has nothing to do with the threat of strangers in the forest
i’m making sure you understand the moral of the story

forgive my salt
but i will skin hides
and dig my way out with my teeth
if i must.

02.02.17
FORTUNA
pebble valley
i’ve been here before
before you i mean,
i’m learning to allow
to sink and breath
if you only knew, the state i was in
before you caught me
belly up and tender
if i told you
no one has ever seen my full
would you run
or would you hold me –
embrace the honey
and never forget where the sting comes from

BOOT(S)TRAPS
how dare you
i bet, you’ve never heard me scream
a little too close to home
have you any idea what we can do
don’t rest easy child
this world is out for you
alternate-facts don’t deceive the blind
and we’re roaring
i may be a big fish in a small pond
but you don’t know
the ripple i can have
when you’ve threatened my home

SUGARDADDY
there’s calmness in the air
the kind that lets you know
it’s okay to jump off the highest mountain
and swim the deepest oceans
a kind of life-vest
urging you to go further
deeper
a kind of challenge you can accept
at the risk of
taking on another,
and another.
comfortability reminding you
that you can always be
uncomfortable

1.11.17
SUGARDADDY
prowler
a general viscosity in the perhaps
connecting figures across the water
making space-ships out air molecules.
you may find it tame
to recall the influence of past descriptions
but it is in our nature
where we reclaim the once free to-do options.
not incarnated
not distingushed
not seeking the spotlight of many
simply rendering humility it’s rightful throne
learning wisdom
and proper appreciation within the herd
there’s no sheep here
when we allow
every wolf
to be part of a pack.

1.9.17
TAROT
Death XIII (Major Arcana)

“i know i may not pass this test
but oh, Death
i’ll raise my eyes to the sky
give me great feathered wings to fly
but please, now is not my time to die
i’ve been speaking with the dead
Removed from my physical proximity
But riling through my lungs, oxygen
regimented pain, reminding me of purpose
as i hurl myself
unflinching, unblinking
into the glow of luminescent tomorrows
without you, i have been speaking with the dead
SHE who was reluctant to reveal my amputated dreams
but keeps me in her good graces
beCause i love her
i have to tell her
there are those who would defang you
sprinkling disreputable memories in the well-water of your good-ness
those discontents roaming aimlessly
shouting voices unheard
SHE speaks to me in dreams
her melancholic whispers prevent my fevered reconsiderations
SHE knows
SHE showed me my future, became my past
in what seemed like the same breath
in my remembrance
i explode backwards
my rarely punctuated heartbeat
runs on setencing me daily to begin without her
those lingering pomegranate sunsets ready me for her meticulous inspection
we see the same stars
and i will continue building this legacy we started together
grateful that SHE armed me with conviction in my condemnation
will not falter in her absence
i will luminate every horizon revealed to me
‘Cause i’m not angry anymore
my insomniatic refusals to continue conversations we started
when SHE was in the flesh no longer
called from my ranker
though, there are days when her presence is skin i’ve never shed
there are days when the rustling of leaves resembles her laughter and I spin on my heels
seeking her face in a box of dead trees
there are days when i miss her like teeth
but I promise, I’m not angry anymore
because I know she would’ve given her life to be here
and I am here
eagerly awaiting the blanket of stars to cover me so that when slumber finally takes me
SHE and I
we will continue this
conversation”

POLY
we’re shaking cold with anticipation
i’ve fallen off the wagon
but you still choice to warm my hands in yours
despite the cough in your lungs.
your eyes tell me
the ring on your finger
has never been heavier.

SUGARDADDY
the calm before the storm
is not so calm
when the raindrops falling from the ceiling
don’t know if their floor will be hot coals
ready to fire at any minute
fearful children shooting coping riffles with their mouths
a bullet is as good a tool
as handshake.
children coping in war
killing their own team
we make our choices:
i choose to stand tall amongst the cedars
i choose to bear a low enough fruit for everyone to eat
i choose to comfort
i choose to encourage
i choose to not put down the one that asks for help
i choose kindness.