a thump thump in the back of my skull
stiff neck, aching muscles and
two lovers – four beds
you’d think it was a full moon.
there’s no teeth here
no hackles raised.
i don’t want to know you,
feel your bed mold around my body like safe keep
your lips tracing fingers of perhaps in my nightstand.
humming a purr from my chest
how can satisfaction leave you so parched?
“to be idolized or recognized?”
the sequence was not intentional
i see the pattern
there’s a lightness in all of us. mine happens to be aimless hopes and, national dismemberment of the self.
you like stripping down people don’t you? peeling back the layers, pixeling the puzzle, alphabetizing strengths and weakness by convenience
so you can sit back and
if you know it, you understand it
understand it and you rationalize it
rationalize it and it can’t touch you feel it creeping getawaytooclose
maybe i’m bitter lava and tidy playlists
maybe i’m just a good mirror for you.
On the spirit of lash-out
how dare you.
split my remained in two
wake the wildness within my bones and leave the beast
to fend for itself
eat or be eaten by your own pulse.
rattle me enough to shake my foundation, just enough to make me question, just enough to make me want
more, more, more
of your skin across my skin, of your smallest kindness, your touch of humanity, your desire and detachment of all things real – how dare you mold me
soiled your hands of disregard, solid apathy for me to wrap around you
finger pointer, you grave digger, you beast maker, you dreamweaver
i pray to one day mussel your bright, tame your wild, infuriate your calm
or at the very best
forgive my beast
and walk away.
stay the fuck away from my dreams
“and well, I lost it.”
I bite my tongue to not dismember yours.
Comfort and forgiveness are easier said than done
It’s not okay.
Let the guilt hang from your ear like a poorly delivered shot –
you missed the mark. pathetic attempts at sensuality,
your body’s rusted with insecurity.
settle in it, little fish
before you try to play
with the big cats again
let that eere-ring weight down your inhibitions
sassafras roots and mimosa bark
been there done that.
chirp chirp pretty pet
eat off my hand and
feel it wrap around your throat.
i miss-judged your innocence for competency
and lost something valuable
i will not. be so foolish.
i’ve been caught in brambles
mistaken a war
for a battle
and laid down my sword. to soon.
i’ve destroyed, only fragments
and have left enough for shaky foundations
too much room to enter
there’s a beast that shows its teeth
King Kong barrels in rampage
Ishmael tells you about their wood
i roll with the punches
strokes and compassions
trying simply to
hold hands with myself.
my sincere condolences to the casualties of war.
im beginning to question myself
to tame the madness
with the peace prospect
to forget any shoe dropped in the first place.
I’ve been caught belly up from bellow, you scratch my surface
and ripple my spine into sensation
did you know id been crystal before now?
Jane Doe between our actions
not sure who’s taming who – maybe we’re just sloppy. slapping bodies together until our skin breaks.
this is what you wanted isn’t it?
its not hurricane
but i can feel the rain again – the sky would never fall for free.
a better bed than any of the many ive been laid on
where i sleep
your eagerness is capricious
but your hands are shaking.
slow down kid
chosen, bells and i
to taste gold and
come close enough to glory to
be edged between
greatness and no longer human.
deviants with wisdom beyond their wisdom
eyes too small too thirsty
purging our faces of what we can no longer hold.
so we settle.
for us to stay because we
quaint combination of fingertips
laced with crow it seems
i must keep one foot off the earth
to feed wolven archetypes
im a master
hoping only to humm it tame
ill imagine my insanity your reflection
somethings gotta give
Ive met the orchid man before
the one i plead with- not while i hold you
the one that won’t die
no matter how punctured
stubborn dull sword. she’s special.
even in my dreams
gratuitous acrobatics and unnecessary
splitting at the storylines
we’re in this together somehow
regain grace in pieces of myself
do you find it this hard too?
im purging out exhaustion
calling up the neighbor skin
to toughen up
the sweat cold bath feverish in recoils
4:00 a.m bloodbaths
and an unseen need to
cave into good nature
I’m breaking an entering
into my own domain
hoping to gut out the tar from my toes
and fill it with good fortune
no more war
no more war
no more war